Posted by Thandiubani on Wed 10th Jul, 2019 – tori.ng
Following the recent interview by Busola Dakolo, details have emerged as to why Busola didn’t speak up against allegation.
Pastor Biodun Fatoyinbo
Sexual assault has dependably been an issue, as of late, the conduits have created an avenue for more ladies to recount to their ordeals. This got to show you that every teenager has a story to tell.
This group of people(young ones) are really defenceless at that age which makes them more vulnerable to their predators.
On certain occasions, these supposed r*pe incidences happened years and even decades ago, just like the viral stories of Mrs Busola Dakolo versus Abiodun Fatoyinbo – the COSA Pastor accused of assault by the former.The incident brought up a lot of reactions from different people. Some people where busy asking “why she didn’t speak up earlier”, “why now after almost two decades?
I would love to say this, ” just because an unfortunate victim doesn’t voice out immediately about an assault doesn’t mean the allegations are false”, the way she expressed herself might seem untrue but the fact is that there is a r*pe case here, so it will be better to be aware of such incidence to avoid future occurrence than to make some excuses.
Without a doubt, there are numerous reasons why victims of r*pe may dither to stand up following such occurrence:
1. Society will, in general, accuse the unfortunate victim predominantly the female folks, for what befalls them.
Some will say that it’s the ladies who throw themselves on the man especially if he’s a good looking man. The others will even give excuses that the Guy is human and can be tempted backing it up with an opinion that “body no be wood”, without considering the fact that consent is really important in such act. In some recent cases of r*pe the unfortunate victim was accused of trying to bring down the man. This is very insensitive due to the fact that the action itself has already caused a damage to the victim, why not consider the pain and the agony he/she is passing through as a result of the assault.
2 There’s an obsolete social conviction that decent ladies don’t get assaulted. Such convictions can make the victim to believe that the r*pe may have been their own fault. Individuals ask unfortunate victims questions for example, “Why were you in that place at that time?,” ” why did you wear seductive dress at the time” and “Why did you go to that person’s room?” Such inquiries can move the fault to the victim instead of the culprit however such hypothesis can’t stand in the assault case between Busola Dakolo Vs COZA Pastor – Abiodun Fatoyinbo as the unfortunate victim affirmed that the Pastor strolled into their family house when her parents were absent and assaulted her.
3 Due to the way people will react, speaking up about a r*pe incident can be agonizing and can cause the victim humiliation, shame and segregation in the society. Sometimes the society view this victims as if they are some sort of evil spirit and will always use the r*pe incident to describe the person anytime any day.
4 It’s especially troublesome if a victim is accusing a powerful individual in the public arena or somebody who has control over them. They hardly speak up due to the fear of being attacked or killed by this powerful people and so for some reasons, the victims may feel that it could be simpler to attempt to proceed onward from the assault without speaking up with the hope of healing on their own but in most cases you find out that it becomes very difficult for them to heal totally unless they open up, reasons why some cases are been reported after several years. The psychological effects of r*pe is very difficult to handle alone.
5. Last but not the least, most of these r*pe victims usually get victimized by somebody they know very well, which can make it harder for them to speak up. This is the reason every parent should be involved in the growth of their children, don’t be to busy not to teach them about sex education, how to be bold enough to express themselves and strong enough to fight for their lives, ensuring them of their safety in your hands. Watch out for those pervert uncles, cousin, relations, close family friends, neighbours, mates, lesson teachers etc, nah them. The predators are also within.
(ATTACHED BELOW ARE SCREENSHOTS OF DIFFERENT STORIES OF OTHERS WHO SHARED THEIR CHILDHOOD EXPERIENCES INCLUDING ADESUA)